Festival of Fears
Theme: Cultural Traditions & Anxiety
Hello my lovely readers—Pavithra here, back with another twist from MY TWISTED LIFE JOURNAL.
Festivals. A time for color, food, celebration… and for me, silent panic. While everyone else danced to drumbeats and lit sparklers with joy, I often found myself shrinking in the shadows. Behind the vibrant sarees and forced smiles was a girl who just wanted to escape the crowd.
The noise, the greetings, the expectations to be polite, graceful, talkative—none of it came naturally. I remember once, during a grand family function, I excused myself just to sit inside a locked bathroom stall. Thirty minutes passed. I wasn’t sick—I just couldn’t breathe.
What people see as festive spirit, I often experience as performance pressure. Being asked to greet distant relatives, forced to answer questions about school or life, made to pose for pictures with people I barely knew—it drained every ounce of energy.
Wearing clothes I didn’t feel comfortable in, pretending to be someone who loved the crowd… was exhausting.
What no one talks about is how deeply cultural norms can affect someone with anxiety.
I don’t hate my culture—I love it. But sometimes, tradition doesn’t leave room for emotional space. And in those moments, I feel like a misfit in my own roots.
Over time, I’ve learned how to find my corners of calm amidst the chaos. I still attend festivals, but now I carry tiny anchors—my music, a book, a quiet balcony to sneak away to when it gets too much.
Because it's not about rejecting tradition, but finding ways to belong without losing yourself.
If you’ve ever felt like hiding during a celebration, trust me—you’re not alone. Let’s create space for honesty amidst all the rituals.
Drop your own festival stories in the comments, share this post with someone who gets it, and stay tuned for more messy, real, and healing stories right here on MY TWISTED LIFE JOURNAL.
Let’s embrace the chaos together.
With love,
Pavithra
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